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Angbandish Fun (r.g.r.a highlights) - YAFM but not real ones

> The Dracolich finds a trap!
> The Dracolich falls through a trap door!
> The Dracolich is too big and becomes stuck halfway through!
> You point and laugh at the Dracolich!
> You see a trapdoor clogged by an oversized monster.

Dark Tyger



> You have 3 disks of Redhat 8.0 (d)
> You activate Redhat.
> Disks begin to spin.
> 30 min later you have upgraded
> Ctrl-Alt-Del
> Machine reboots.
> You feel the default config of grub cannot handle your two Win2k + linux installation.
> You try to configure grub. <3x>
> You try to type (hdb5,1). > Grub wails at you.
> You mangle your Win2k partition with angband.
> You die.

Jagath Samarabandu



> You feel the Windows (95) on your hard drive is broken.



> You can't bear to part with your Macintosh (-50, -50) (-10 int, speed) {cursed}.



> The Linux software displays an error message.
> The support list says RTFM.
> The documentation is missing and the Web site is 404.
> You are confused!



> You put on the Wedding Ring.
> Oops!
> It feels deathly cold!
> You feel the Wedding Ring you are wearing (c) is cursed.
> It nags you.
> It nags you.
> It hits you.
> It claws you.
> You feel very stupid.
> It claws you.
> You feel very naive.
> It gains fifty pounds.
> You feel yourself slow down.
> It touches you.
> Your Credit Card ($30,000 limit) was stolen!
> Something casts a spell.
> It touches you.
> The Bill Collector touches you.
> 30,000 gold pieces were stolen!
> There is a puff of smoke!
> It summons In-Laws.
> The In-Law criticises you.
> The In-Law tells a stupid anecdote.
> The In-Law breathes tobacco smoke.
> *** LOW HITPOINT WARNING! ***
> You have a Gun (3d4) (+300, +300).
> * to select target.
> There is a loud bang!
> You die.



> "You have no room for an Urgent Email (3d4).
> Inventory command:
> a) a Spam (64k)
> b) a Spam (12k)
> c) a Spam (3k)
> d) a Spam (131k)
> e) a Spam (2k)
> f) a Spam (17k)
> g) a Spam (64k)
> h) a Spam (5k)
> i) a Spam (15k)
> j) a Spam (3k)
> k) a Spam (1k)
> l) a Spam (8k)
> m) a Spam (56k)
> n) a Spam (18k)
> o) a Spam (156k)
> p) a Spam (4k)
> q) a Spam (43k)
> r) a Spam (19k)
> s) a Spam (37k)
> t) a Spam (8k)
> u) 6 Spams (11k)
> v) a Spam (4k)
> w) 19 Spams (2k)
> You destroy your entire inventory!
> You have no room for an Urgent Email (3d4).
> Inventory command:
> a) a Spam (7k)
> b) 408 Spams (2k)
> c) 2 Spams (3k) ...



Confused Stunned Bleeding Slow (-17)
WTH happened to me?!
> Equipment command:
> a) a Windows (XP) {broken} 4 GB
> b) a Norton Anti-Virus 300 MB
> c) Microsoft Office 2000 {cursed} 2 GB
> d) MSIE 4.5 {broken} 500 MB
> e) The Email Client of Darkess 'Outlook Express' {infected}
> f) a Virus {cursed} 4 MB
> g) The Worm 'Klez.h' {cursed} 3 MB
> h) a Trojan {cursed} 3 MB
> i) Norton CrashGuard 2K {broken} 20 MB
> j) AOL {cursed, permacurse, Ancient Foul Curse} 7 GB
> k) (nothing) 50 GB
(nothing)? 50 gigs? Must be hidden IE cache files or something
> The TY_CURSE activates!
> You are paralyzed!
> The Cyberdemon fires a rocket.
> The Cyberdemon fires a rocket.
> The Cyberdemon fires a rocket.
> Why does this always happen to me?!
> Dump character (y/n)



> Equipment command:
> a) The Operating System 'Windows' (-6 to speed) {cursed}
> On the floor: The Operating System 'Debian Woody' (+20 to speed)
> In your pack: a Partition Magic of *Remove Curse* (i)
I'm saved!



> You have an MP3 Collection of Songs [Journey's Greatest Hits Vol. 1] (a)
> The RIAA magically summons Lawyers!
> The Lawyer sues you.
> The Lawyer sues you.
> The Lawyer sues you.
> 60000000000000 gold pieces were stolen!
> There is a puff of smoke!
> The Lawyer sues you.
> Your MP3 Collection of Songs [Journey's Greatest Hits Vol. 1] (a) was stolen!
> There is a puff of smoke!
> The Lawyer sues you.
> The Lawyer sues you.
> You die.

all those courtesy of Neo 1061

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